Sex Ed
by BeyondYourWildestDreams
Summary: The So Random and Mack Falls casts have to take sex-ed together! Channy! Please review and tell me if it's stupid and/or lame!
1. NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

CHAPTER 1

Today started out as a regular Monday at Condor Studios. But that changed pretty quickly when we walked into our classroom after lunch.

"Good afternoon, class," said Ms. Bitterman in her usual dreary way.

"Good afternoon, Ms. Bitterman," we replied, just as drearily.

"Now, I'm assuming you're all wondering why we have some extra desks in our room, today," she droned.

Actually, I hadn't even noticed, but now that I was looking around the room, I saw five extra desks next to ours.

"The reason why they're here is because we will be having some guests joining us for the next few weeks."

As if on cue, the main cast of _Mackenzie Falls _filed in. And guess who sat in the desk next to mine? Chad Dylan Cooper.

"So anyway, we will be studying a special health unit together: sex education!"

_NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!_


	2. Gotta Get Out Of Here

**Chapter 2**

_A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I thought people would think this was weird, but it's actually my most popular story yet! Thanks for all your support!_

I had heard her wrong. I _must_ have. Did she really expect me to take this class? With GUYS in the room? SO not happening! Then I remembered something. When they taught this... _topic _at my school in Wisconsin, it wasn't co-ed. The guys went in one room ,and the girls in another. Of course! _That_ was why the _Mack Falls_ people were joining us, so we could split into a bigger guy group and a bigger girl group.

"Now_, "_ she continued. "We normally split you up by gender, but since we don't have any male teachers here right now, we will all be taking this class together."

_NNNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!_

This was _the_ worse thing that had ever happened to me. Even worse than the time a ladybug crawled in my snadwhich and I accidentally bit it in half!

I had to get out of this. I just _had_ to.

"Um, Ms. Bitterman?" I began. "I have uh... a stomachache."

She eyed me carefully, like she didn't believe me. I don't blame her. I can act great on _So Random!_, but under pressure... well, not so much.

"Are you sure?" she asks suspiciously. "You seemed fine a couple minutes ago."

"Oh, yes, I was. But... it just started now?" _Very convicing, Munroe_.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Chad watching me. I can tell he wanted to laugh, but was trying to remain "serious" and "mature".

"Look, can I just go to the bathroom?" I asked.

"Very well," she said. But come right back afterwards.

_Yes! _I had bought some time. I tried to walk slowly, to stall. But after a few minutes, I heard someone coming up behind me...


	3. I Can See Right Through You

**Chapter 3**

I froze for a second. Then I realized that I was being paranoid, and whoever it was probably wasn't even following me. So I just kept walking. But then I heard the footsteps again. I started to walk a bit faster this time, hoping that whoever was following me got the message. But I guess they didn't, because after a few seconds, I heard them again.

By now, I had a feeling of who it probably was, and I was _not _in the mood to see anyone right now, especially them. So I turned down the hallway that led to the _So Random!_ dressing rooms and ran. Yeah, they'd probably follow me, but at least I'd be able to lock the door on them when I got inside.

I ran inside the dressing room I share with Tawni and locked the door. _Safe at last!_ But then I heard someone unlock the door. I ran and hid behind the red curtain that we change behind. The door opened, and someone walked inside. They headed towards the curtain and started to draw it to one side. I held my breath and saw...

"Tawni!" I exclaimed, relieved. "It's only you!" I should have known. She was the only one (besides me) who had a key to our dressing room.

She gave me a sly smile. "You thought I was Chad, didn't you?"

"No no, of course not!" I said, trying to sound convincing. Apparently, it didn't work, because she gave me one of her "I don't believe you" looks. "Why would you say that?"

"I saw you looking at him in class." How could she have seen that? I only looked at him out of the corner of my eye! Or at least, I _thought_ I only looked at him out of the corner of my eye.

I decided to play dumb. "Huh?"

"Fine, act like you _don't_ know what I'm talking about. Anyway, your stomach seems to be feeling better."

"Oh, yeah, it's all better?" I said. I had completely forgotten about that. She gives me that look again. "Fine, it was never there in the first place," I admitted. "So, how did _you_ get out of class?"

"Bitterman dismissed us early. It was really awkward, so we basically just sat there in silence for ten minutes."

"So what, does this mean the class is cancelled?" I ask hopefully.

"No, but she wants us to feel more 'comfortable' around each other, so tomorrow we're going to do some of those 'getting to know you' excercises." Under normal circumstances I'd be excited. We did them every year during the first week of school back home, and they were really fun. But they'd probably be _super_ awkward if we had to do them with the _Mackenzie Falls_ cast.

"So, getting back to the subject, why did you _really_ leave?" she asked.

"I was... nervous." I tell her. It wasn't a lie. It just wasn't the _enitire_ truth.

"About Chad," she said. Damn, she's spot on. She smirked, the kind of smirk someone makes when they _know_ they're right about something. "You can't hide it from me, Sonny. I can see right through you."

By now, I was sweating a bit, and I was sure I was blushing, too. "Yeah, and get this," she continued. "Our spots today are our _permanent seats_ fot the rest of the class." I sweated even more, and felt my cheeks get even hotter.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" I asked.

"A bit," she smiled. _Grrrrr....._


	4. Three Words

**Chapter 4**

I went to bed last night shaking and sweating. I figured I'd feel better in the morning.

Boy, was I wrong.

If anything, I felt even worse. I managed to blot most off the sweat off, but I practically had to glue my arms to my sides just to hide their shakiness.

I barely made it through this morning's sketch rehearsals. By the time I walked into class, I was the textbook definition of a nervous wreck.

But, as usual, I tried to look on the bright side of things. Today we wouldn't even be talking about that, um, _stuff. _We were just going to be doing of those "getting to know each other" exercises.

Also, the desks had been moved aside, and the chairs had been arranged into a circle in the center of the room.

Tawni and I were first to class, and we chose two chairs that were next to each other. One by one, everyone else came in, except for Zora and Chad. There were only two seats left-the one next to Tawni, and the one next to me.

Zora came in first, and headed over to the chair next t mine, but before she could sit down, Tawni called "Hey Zora! Saved you a seat!", grinned, and eagerly tapped the empty chair next to her. as if they were best friends or something.

I knew the only reason she said that was so that I would have to sit next to Chad... _again._ And it would be even worse this time, because the chairs were literally _right next to each other! _But I wasn't _too_ worried, because I know Zora, and I knew she would _never _want to sit next to Tawni unless she absolutely _had _to, and would get her for even _implying_ that she would.

I was right. Zora was about to let Tawni _really _have it, but Bitterman wouldn't have her doing _that, _now, would she? So she gave Zora a Look, and Zora just slumped into the seat next to Tawni.

Just then, Chad came in, trying to act cool, of course, as usual. He slid into the seat next to mine (duh) looked over at me, and smirked. I pretended not to notice, but I don't think I did a very good job.

"Okay, everyone," began Ms. Bitterman. "As I said yesterday, today we will do an excercise that will help us all bond and get to know each other better." Ha! Good luck. I'd already tried to get our shows to bond several times, and each attempt had ended in disaster. "It's called Three Words," she continued. She pulled out a black top hat. "There are eleven slips of paper in this hat, one for each of you. Each slip has a different subject relating to you on it. When the hat is passed to you, you will randomly choose a slip, read the subject, and tell us three words that describe it. Now, who would like to begin?"

Tawni's hand shot up. I wasn't at all surprised. Tawni absolutely _loves_ to talk about herself. She pulled a slip pf paper from the hat. "Yourself," she read. "Easy! I'm pretty, beautiful, and, uh..." she leaned over to me. "What's a word that means the same thing as 'pretty' and beautiful'?" she whispered in my ear.

"Um..." I said, trying to think of one. "Gorgeous?"

"Gorgeous!" finished Tawni. Everyone rolled their eyes. As usual, I tried to look on the bright side. At least we were bonding (well, sort of)! True, it was just over Tawni's usual annoying snobby and shallow attitude, but at least it was a start!

Tawni handed the hat to me, and I pulled out a slip of paper. "Your perfect spouse." I read. I froze as I realized what I had just said.

Yes, I could think of three words to describe my perfect spouse. But I was definitely _not _about to say those three words out loud, with everyone staring at me. What was I going to do?

* * *

**R&R please! Oh! And let me know what you think Sonny's three words are! The first person to guess correctly will recieve a shoutout in the next chapter of this fanfic, AND have a link to their profile on my page for at least a week!**

**YOU CAN ONLY ENTER ONCE!**


	5. Şirin Yakışıklı Sarışın

**Chapter 5**

* * *

**Hey everyone! Before I begin this next chapter, I would like to take a few moments to thank everyone who's read, reviewed, reccomended, favorited, or added me to their favorite authors list.**

**PEOPLE WHO HAVE REVIWED THIS FANFIC**

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**PEOPLE WHO BOTH REVIEWD AND FAVED THIS STORY**

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**PEOPLE WHO BOTH REVIEWED AND ADDED ME TO THEIR FAVE AUTHORS LIST**

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**And, as promised, the winner of the Three Words Contest (the first person to correctly guess Sonny's three words from Chapter 4), who will be added to my fave authors list, have a link to their profile included on my page for at least a week, and have the next chapter (Chapter 6) dedicated to them, is... LilRockerStar! Congratulations!**

**PEOPLE WHO GUESSED ALL 3 WORDS CORRECTLY (AND NO, NOT EVERYONE WHO ENTERED DID!) **

**LilRockerStar (contest winner!)**

**awtwin1**

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**Now, on with the show (er, story)!**

* * *

Chad Dylan Cooper.

Those were the words. The only words I could think of (at that particular moment) to describe my dream husbund. You can probably see why I wasn't about to say them out loud, for everyone to hear.

But, I did have to say _something,_ right? I suppose I _could_ have lied, but I would have felt _soooo_ guilty if I did that, since I'm _such _an honest to God saint (and also because my voice gets all high and squeaky whenever I lie about something, especially when that something has anything to do with Chad Dylan Cooper). I decided the solution to this little problem was to get creative, but without technically _lying _to them.

"Dach..." I began. "Landy... Opcore?"

I looked around the room at everyone (well, except for Chad), hoping I'd fooled them. Each person had a confused look on their face. "Are those even real words?" asked one of the girls from _Mackenzie Falls_.

"Oh, yes!" I answer, trying to sound convincing. "They're, uh, Turkish!"

"For what?" she demanded.

"For, um... charming, blonde, handsome," Whoa! That was weird! The words seemed to come to me from thin air!

"No," she corrected. "The Turkey words for 'charming, blonde, handsome' are 'Şirin, yakışıklı, sarışın'. I learned them when I was in Turkey shooting a movie."

"Did I say Turkish? I meant Swedish!" Nice save there, Munroe. Now let's just hope she hasn't shot a movie in Sweden.

I just quickly passed the hat to Chad (without looking at him, of course) before I found out the answer, and tried to quickly move the excecise along, so that no onw ould bring it up again, until everyone had had a turn.

She let us go once we were all done. Phew! I was afraid she'd ask us what the excercise had "taught us about each other", like my old teachers back in Wisconsin used to do.

I headed off with Nico and Grady to rehearse a sketch, trying to get through it ASAP, so I could pack up, go home, and just _relax_ for awhile.

I managed to get through the rehearsal okay, and I thought the presseure was over for the day. But when I got back to my dressing room, I realized how wrong I was about _that._

It was dark when I entered it. I headed over to the lightswitch, but before I could get there, someone yelled "Grab her!"

I screamed as I was picked up, thrown into a chair, and tied to it.

A light turned on above my head, like the ones you see in those old detective movies, when the cops are interrogating a suspect.

I was confused, and also a bit scared. "What's going on?" I asked.

"Sonny Munroe..." said a voice that sounded like it had been changed using a Darth Vader Voice Changer. "This is it..."

* * *

Sorry the chapters are so short! I'm just super busy, but trust me! I'm doing my best here!

R&R plz!


	6. Admit It

**Chapter 6**

SONNY POV

"What?" I asked, terrified. "What's 'it'?"

Suddenly, the lights flickered back on. I saw Tawni standing in front of me, dressed in a cop costume from one of our sketches. I also saw Grady guarding my door, and Nico guarding Tawni's door. They were both dressed in security guard-type outfits. Zora was in the room as well. She was standing in front of the red curtain, wearing the Darth Vader Voice Changer mask.

"Grady!" Zora cried out in frustration. "Why'd you turn the lights back on?"

"I, well, I'm kinda... afraid of the dark," he said that last part pretty quietly.

"Oh, please! That's so lame!" said Zora.

"Now now, Zora," spoke up Tawni. "I'm glad Grady had such courage to admit this deep dark secret," she said so dramatically, you'd think this was one of our sketches if you heard her.

"Well, I don't know if you'd call it _that_," said Grady, modestly blushing. "But-"

"Shut up!" Tawni interrupted in a loud whisper. Then she turned back to me and smiled that "stage" smile of hers. "As I was saying, he acted with such courage, such bravery, such..."

"Modesty?" Grady supplied. This time, all Tawni had to do was give him one of her deathly warning glances, and he fell silent immediately.

"Fine. Modesty. Whatever," Tawni said in her "offstage" impatient voice. "Anyway," she continued, her voice turning super sweet and sugary again. "even though Grady is gross and annoying, he was able to _admit something to us._" Tawni was staring right at me now. "Is there anything _you'd_ like to admit, Sonny?" She was all "up in my face" now.

My mind jumped back to the "Dach Landy Opcore" incident. "No," I replied slowly. "Why would I?" my voice was speeding up a bit, and getting a little higher than usual, so I figued it would be best to try not to talk that much.

"Really?" asked Tawni. She was even _more_ "up in my face" now.

"Yup," I answered with an awkward smile.

"Okaaay..." said Tawni. "Then how do you explain... "THIS?" She reached in her pocket, trying to find something. "Where is it?" she muttered to herself. "Hey, do any of you guys have the sheet?"

The other three checked. "Here it is!" said Zora, running over to Tawni with a slightly ripped piece of paper. She handed it to her.

"Thanks," Tawni whispered to her. She turned back to me. "How do you explain... THIS?" She held the piece of paper up in front of me.

It had, in red pen, six words. Three of them were crossed out. They were "Dach Landy Opcore".

And I'm sure you can guess what the three words that_ weren't_ crossed out were.

If you said "Chad Dylan Cooper," then you're correct! Sorry, no prizes, because let's face it, I didn't think anyone _would_ actually figure it out in the first place!

My jaw must have hit the floor. "How did you...? How could you...? But... I thought I hid it so well! I didn't think anyone would..."

"Figure it out?" Tawni finished for me. "Ha! _Never_ underestimate the astounding brainpower of The Great-"

"Zora Landcaster!" Zora interrupted, popping out from behind Tawni.

D'oh! I should have known Zora would figure it out. After all, she _is_ a certified genius.

"Fine! Congratulations! You figured it out! Now, will you please let me go?" I asked.

"Sure!" Tawni said brightly. "Just as soon as you admit it."

"Admit what?" I asked, even though I was 99.9999999% sure what the answer would be.

"That you have a crush on Chad," replied Tawni. I knew it!

I felt myself blush a little when she said it, but tried to hide it. I rolled my eyes. "Come on Tawni, please let me go?"

"Not until you admit you like Chad," said Tawni. I could tell she was enjoying this, which just annoyed me even more.

"Zora?" I asked. She merely shook her head.

"Nico?"

He started walking over, but one of Tawni's glares had him running back toward his position. "Sorry!" he mouthed to me, once Tawni had turned to face me again.

There was only one person left, Grady. Lucky for me, I had a foolproof way to get him to untie me. See, one day, a few weeks after I joined the cast, I came across a small room labled "Janitor's Closet" a few doors dwn from my dressing room, that had funny sounds coming out of it. It opened the door and... there was Grady, eating a _huge_ bock of cheese. It turned out that it was Grady's secret cheese stash, and he had forgotten to lock the door.

"Grady," I began slyly. "I have a great idea. I was thinking that I would go to the 'Janitor's Closet' and-"

I never finished that sentence. Grady had already ran over to me, and was untying the knots the held me on the chair. Tawni and Zora tried to grab him, but Nico managed to grab them and hold them back. "RUN FOR IT!" yelled Grady, when he had finished untying me. Both he and Nico rushed out Tawni's door before Tawni and Zora could stop them. I tried to escape, too, but they had already grabbed me before I could even take more than a couple steps.

"Aren't you gonna go after them?" I asked, trying to focus their attention away from me.

That managed to distract them for a few seconds, which was all I needed to open my door and start runnning down the hallway to the studio parking lot.

"After her!" Zora cried, and the chase was on!

While they were running after me, they called out things such as "Get her!" and "You can run, but you can't hide!" but I didn't say anything back. I knew if I lost focus, even for a _split second_ it would all be over.

I finally managed to get to the parking lot (which, yes, was safe to run through, since there were only about four other cars in it), hop in my car, and drive away. They didn't chase me through the parking lot, but they still kept calling things after me. The last thing I heard before turing onto the road was Tawni shouting "Deny it all you want, but we know you like Chad!"

* * *

TAWNI POV

"Deny it all you want, but we know you like Chad!" I called to Sonny. I don't think she heard me though, since she was in her car, driving away.

"What did you just say?" a voice said from behind me.

"I sense something." began Zora. "A presence I've not felt since... this morning." I rolled my eyes at that.

We turned around. "What do you want Chad?" I asked. "And are you doing here so late?"

"What are _you_ two doing in a cop costume and a Darth Vader mask?" he countered. Yes, Zora still had that stupid mask on.

"What's wrong with the mask?" asked Zora, but her voice sounded like Darth Vader's.

"What's wrong with the mask?" repeated Chad. "What's wrong with the mask? I'll _tell_ you what's wrong with the mask. _I _should've gotten that part. _I_ should be wearing that mask right now. Do you hear me? _I _should've played Anakin in _Star Wars, Episodes I _through _III_. It should've been _me!_" And with that, he ran off towards his car, got in it, and drove away.

"Sheesh," said Zora. "_Somebody_ has issues. I mean, seriously, what does Sonny see in that guy anyway?"

I sighed. "You know, in a situation like this one, I'd normally say 'you'll underrstand when you're older,' but in this case, I'm with ya, sister. I don't know what she sees in him. We may never understand the cheery, quirky creature, that we know as Sonny Munroe."

* * *

**R&R plz! And if you have any ideas on what you want to happen later in the story, tell me them and I might use some of them!**


	7. Okay, New Plan

**Chapter 7**

CHAD POV

I know this'll probably be a surprise to most of you, but my little rant in the parking lot was not really about _Star Wars _(but yeah, I _should _have been picked to play Anakin). Well, it was about _Star Wars _on the surface, but not underneath. Underneath, it was about how those two Randoms tried to trick me into thinking that Sonny actually liked me. Sonny and the other Randoms were probably in on it, and the next day, when I went to tease her about it, they'd act like nothing ever happened, find some way to glue me to the window, and get the whole thing on tape (yes, it _has_ happened before). But see, if I ranted about _that_, then they'd probably get this crazy notion that I liked _her _(which, of course, couldn't be further from the truth).

Then, something weird occured to me when I woke up this morning. What if the Randoms _weren't_ lying? What if Sonny really _did _like me? What if those words she used in that game we played in class yesterday weren't actually from some foregin language, but were just the letters of my name, mixed up?

I knew that these things probably weren't true (especially that last one), and I was stupid for even thinking that they could be. But... what if they were?

I don't know why, but suddenly I was _dying_ to find out. I started trying to think of a plan to discover the truth.

My first idea was to re-arrange the letters of those three words from yesterday to see if they spelled my name (as if they actually would), but I ruled that one out pretty quickly, since I didn't even know how to spell "Dach Landy Opcore". I suppose I could get the rest of the _Mack Falls_ cast to do it for me, but that would take all the fun out of it, wouldn't it?

My next idea was to make on of those "check box" sheets for Sonny to fill out, but I ditched that one pretty quickly, too. It would make it seem as if I liked Sonny. Which, as I said before, I DO NOT.

After several more lame ideas, I finally decided to try being nice to Sonny for the day, and see how she'd react. This way, if someone thought I liked her (which I DO NOT) I could just tell them it was part of a prank. Yeah, that'd be believable enough.

At least, I hoped so.

* * *

SPOV

On Wednesday morning, I woke up sick. Not "sick", like I had been in class on Monday and on Tuesday morning._ Sick_. As in, I had a fever of about 100 or so, and I felt as if I was going to throw up any second.

But, since I had been "sick" yesterday morning, Mom didn't buy it today. She didn't even feel my forehead. She just sent me off to work, as if everything were normal.

I headed over to Stage 1 and checked our schedule for the day. We had... _that class _(yes, I still felt uncomfortable saying it) first today. _Great,_ I thought.

But what could I do? I couldn't go home, that was for sure. But... maybe I could rest in my dressing room. Of course, there was the Tawni factor. She probably wouldn't believe I was actually sick, either, and would most likely bug me about Chad again. But I'd take being teased about liking Chad over actually having to face him.

I started to head down the hallway, back to my dressing room. But as soon as I turned the corner, I bumped into someone. And unfortunately, that someone was none other than Chad Dylan Cooper.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry this chapter was so short! I just couldn't figure out what should happen next. Which is why I want YOU to! If anyone has ANY idea, any idea at ALL of what should happen next, PLEASE comment telling me! Thanx in advance to all that do. :)**

**Peace out suckas! :p**


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